My first self-aware experience with anxiety was during COVID. I was freaking out because I was 7 months pregnant and after seeing empty shelves at the shop, I was somehow more aware of the severity of the Pandemic which made me very PANICKY! so upset that hubby banned me from shopping until our son was born. At the time, I didn’t realize it was anxiety, until my son was born.

As a mum, you’re already on high alert about the safety and wellbeing of your child, so imagine that feeling being amplified!

If you’re not familiar with anxiety, it is an anticipation of future threat which causes an unpleasant inner turmoil which includes feelings of dread. For me, it showed up as catastrophizing (I.E fixating on the worst possible outcome and treating it as likely when it’s not).

So, what did I do to manage it?

1.Therapy

Although this is still stigmatized in the African community, I highly recommend it. This provided me with coping mechanisms and the one that works for me until this day is TAKING A LONG DEEP BREATH!

2. Journaling

This has always helped me in identifying and acknowledging my feelings/emotions. When journaling, I trace back the root cause of the negative emotion I’m feeling by identifying when I started feeling that way.

For example, “I started feeling sad when friend X told me about their wedding engagement”. From here, you can begin to explore why you felt sad. For example, Do you think it won’t happen for you? Do you feel sad because your friend is ending up with a loser? LOL! (Jokes) You get my point!

When you are honest about the why, you can start to do something about it!

3.Pray

Now that you have identified what you feel and why you feel that way, you can start doing something about it. Before I get into problem solving mode, I pray and just tell God how I’m feeling. I do this by verbally praying about it and writing it down in my prayer journal. There’s just something about writing it down that helps me release it into the hands of God.

4. Plan for Success

The main premise of anxiety is that you’re worried about future outcomes. What I’ve learned to do is use it as a reminder to get things done!

For instance, recently, I was worried about Christmas shopping for friends and family in SEPTEMBER!!! (Like who thinks about Christmas that early!) What would have happened previously was, I would worry about it and procrastinate doing anything about it until it was too late which would have gotten me more riled up! Instead, what I did was I created a list of people to get gifts for, went on Pinterest to get ideas and started putting items in carts! I was even able to create a post (Click here to read) to guide you with your own shopping! (Talk about productive!) I’m happy to report that by October, I was done my Christmas shopping! Haha!

So, what’s my point, your worries may be valid, but instead of being stuck in the worry loop, you can do something about it! This is why I recommended praying first because you get ideas on how to tackle the how!

Additionally, a tool that helps me plan is my daily planner. I have created a 2025 digital planner with step-by-step direction on how to plan for your year, month and day in a manner that helps you prioritize your values and ensure you live a well-balanced life! You can check it out here.

I will conclude with the wise words of King Solomon:

It is vain for you to eat the bread of anxious labors (Psalm 127:2)

Instead, give that responsibility to God who will ultimately direct your steps.

Thank you for reading.

Akhere

Also! I have started a WhatsApp Channel where I share more frequently! I post prayers, affirmations, podcast recommendations to assist you in your marriage and/or motherhood journey. You can join us here!

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